I have had an awful migraine all day, and I can only conclude it's some kind of hangover from last night's hallucinogenic X Factor marathon.
I just about managed to blog along live to the show but I appreciate not everyone cares so I might not do it every week.
Here's a quick rundown of what happened:
The judges were each permitted a "Wild Card", so they could bring back one act from their judges' (not their real) houses shortlist. In the show with "no second chances" it turns out there are at least a couple of second chances.
The entire show was totally bonkers and there were several moments where I couldn't quite believe what I was seeing, former PE teacher Wagner fitting around the stage to Ricky Martin's She Bangs, Katie Waissel wearing a crash helmet with a spectrum of visors, pretending to play along on a keyboard that was resting on the backs of two Lycra clad men, Diva Fever skipping around in day-glo cycling shorts... MENTAL.
Standout performances from: Mary Byrne & Aiden Grimshaw
My favourites so far: FYD, Belle Amie, Mary Byrne, Wagner, Aiden Grimshaw
Who should leave tonight: Wagner
Most likely to leave tonight: John Adeleye, Paije Richardson, Nicolo Festa
Number of times Simon said "Relevant": lost count
In spite of spending most of the night completely bewildered it was much more entertaining than usual even if it was a bit long. At least there was some variety for a change.
So onto tonight. I'm mortified to see the producers have chosen to keep the horrendous group performance as an opener to the show. It's just so embarrassing. The song is always rubbish, they mime terribly and there appears to be absolutely no point to it. Tonight I even witnessed the Lesser Spotted Fist-above-Air-Pump-in-Unison, a dance move not seen since the late 1990s.
Usher was great though, even Alpha Male Mr G was impressed.
Now Joe McElderry's turn and then we'll find out which two acts are getting the boot tonight. Stay tuned...