So... being pregnant is very weird.
For something that is currently the size of an avocado, this baby is launching an all-out attack on my entire body:
For starters I can't stay awake longer than about four hours. Yes, I know it doesn't sound much different to my usual snooze-tastic lifestyle, but this is something else. Afternoon naps last on average about three hours now and I still go to bed at the usual time and sleep right the way through the night. Naturally, I am thrilled about this development. Mr G even seems to have stopped nagging me about being asleep all the time. Result.
I still can't drink tea. I fancied a brew the other day at work and was so excited to be drinking my first cup of tea in three months that I emailed my husband to share the good news. Followed an hour later by "Oh. I've just been sick."
I wasn't just sick, it came on so quickly and violently that I actually burst the blood vessels in my face. Attractive.
And following on from that, I have finally admitted defeat in the war on chocolate. I tried in vain to fight the choc, and the choc won. I had a few defiant attempts at eating it for the sake of it but every time the experience was just never as enjoyable as I had anticipated, and usually made me feel ill afterwards so I have now given up even trying. I'm expecting the news that Cadbury's has gone into administration any day now...
I was expecting my emotions to go into overdrive - friends told me stories about crying at adverts - what I wasn't anticipating was just how out of control they would become. Last week, I was listening to the radio and found myself crying at how much I love disco music. Amazing.
All of this pales into insignificance as I learn about things still to come... Yesterday I was going through my latest Bounty Pack and at first I thought someone had kindly sent me some new muffs for my headphones, but then discovered they were in fact nipple pads. "What on earth do I need nipple pads for?" I wondered out loud... and was shocked to discover that milk may well just come pouring out of me any time I go near a crying baby in a few months time. Errr... what?
Having said that, have you heard about Baby Gaga Ice Cream? My friend told me about it because her colleague was one of the donors. It's ice cream made from breast milk. If I start producing enough for a milking parlour (possible, with these waps) I could always sell some on for a bit of extra cash. Judging by the fact the ice cream sold out in 2 days, there's clearly a demand for it.
But never mind all that, spare a thought for poor Lucy Liu who seems to be affected by all the wild hormones in the house and does not know what to do with herself. Anyone else's dog done this?